Saturday, April 28, 2007

maths/math

During my daily trips to the David Jones foodcourt, there's this one book that is constantly up in my face. It's some Jamie Oliver cook book, and it's everywhere. I thought that guy got fat and ate his own face in a goulash or something?

Anyway, remember those math sequence questions from those primary school UNSW-sponsored tests? They looked something like this:



Well, the cover of this Jamie Oliver book begs a similar application of maths aptitude:



How did you answer? Unless you want to be stuck with a shameful 'participation' award, you'd have better answered like this:



Bonus points are awarded if you wanted to remove the "with" from the title.

Monday, April 23, 2007

absolutely, completely, and totally off duty

It's always awkwardly funny when a character in a TV or movie series is replaced by a different actor. Like in Beethoven's 4th, when the children didn't even notice that their father was suddenly JUDGE REINHOLD!!! There's even a whole section of JumpTheShark.com dedicated to dodgy swapping out of actors.

Anyway, I bet you've never heard of this happening on a cartoon. I don't mean the voice actor. I'm talking about the actual character being a totally different person. Well... today I bought the DVD boxset of Inspector Gadget. There was a pilot episode... and nothing, NOTHING, will prepare you for what you are about to see. These two minutes will reach into your memory and retroactively destroy your entire childhood:



Just in case you crave more sacrilege, I also put up the moustachioed opening credits.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

traffic control

You have to be pretty awesome to work for airport traffic control. Just think, sitting up there in that weird tower, they make sure that planes don't crash. All day. Must call for mad skills.

All in all, I would tell people I was an airport traffic controller as often as I could. People would shower me with praise and goods.

Therefore, I reckon this Sydney Airport parking attendant has a pretty sweet deal going on:



Does he get to take the vest home and wear it to movies and bowling and stuff?

Sunday, April 08, 2007

plane tickets don't buy themselves

I love that "You wouldn't steal a CAR" anti-piracy short that we get on every DVD nowadays. My favourite part is when she stops the illegal download at 98% and goes to school instead. Go team!

Anyway, if you think going to school is crazy, you should see the anti-piracy warning that the British get on their DVDs. Did you know that piracy makes videos and other oddments EXPLODE?

Monday, April 02, 2007

news

OK so it's sad and all, but isn't his little face just saying...

What The!?

Oh snap!

Say hi to Saddam for me

In other print media news, some rules of prison I wrote ages ago are published on page 74 of this week's 3D World. That's the 3D World equivalent of page 1. Seriously. Too bad those guys prison broke this season.