Wednesday, June 13, 2007

laser

So the world's got me thinking about lasers. And Red Rooster. But more importantly, lasers. I've managed to conveniently distill my world into this photo, just to set the scene:



So... they're using lasers to stop smoking now?

What else can lasers do? Well, I know for a fact that they fix eyes. And they also play CDs. And guide robots. And stop burglars. And create laser shows. And point at important graphs in business meetings. And they shoot from the Death Star.

Holy fuck! Lasers are awesome!



But hang on a second... are... are these all functions of the same laser? Like, if I pop open my Discman while it's playing, will a laser shoot out, cure my eyes, destroy a Death Star and highlight the monthly sales profit for June?

Surely not?

But then why do they have those laser warnings plastered in places (including on the back of your Discman!)? What makes one laser different from another?

NOTHING, that's what. Next up, burglars will be suing you because your laser alarm system stopped them smoking. Optometrists will rule the universe.



NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!

Monday, June 04, 2007

for everyday use

Rifling through my dad's desk at work, I encountered this:



Ew. Wait, before I jump to conclusions, maybe I should open the drawer fully...



Oh, OBVIOUSLY.